It was Saturday, the 12th of October; I had gone to my hometown on Wednesday evening for a long weekend, after the lectures on Thursday and Friday had been cancelled.
I hadn’t been on a party for a while, so I were looking forward going to a concert on Saturday evening with one of my best friends, to a partyplace, where I’ve been often and where I anyway knew most of the people.
We got ready and went to the place, had some beers, me anyway very few bc I didn’t drink nor consume anything since I got completly into Yoga few months back in India.
The evening was quite nice, I met some old friends, talked to people, and felt not drunk but also already a little bit funny, a state in which I decided to stay for the night.
Everything went normal, we danced, drunk beer, and so on, until I realized, I felt super drunk without even drinking anymore; and I just had had three, four small beer and lot of water out of my waterbottle in between, so I where confused how I became that drunk suddenly.
I kept drinking more water, but still didn’t get better, finally, around four o’clock already, I puked, but still felt horrible afterwards, and no matter how much water I drunk, I didn’t feel more sober or clear…
Finally me and a friend decided to leave, but bc of no public transport nor motivation to take a cab, we decided to look for a place to sleep at the partyplace.
While we entered again, I realized, something wasn’t normal at all with me; as I couldn’t think anymore, not even one clear thought, and within few minutes I lost any idea of what I did the whole night.
I forgot where I was in that present moment.
Because I was so confused and almost not able to talk anymore I didn’t really tell anyone how I felt, even I felt more and more weak and dizzy, and then, as my friend turned away to place a sleeping mat on the floor, I just passed out.
My memories from that whole night are very sparse, I just remember all these moments quite diffuse and forgot almost everything in between; especially everything that happened after I collapsed at 6 o’clock in the morning; so all I write from now on, my friends told me.
After I collapsed, my body was cramping, but after a while I woke up again; my friends sat next to me – but I didn’t recognize them anymore at first and got panic, asked “Where am I?”, as if I had forgot where and who I was.
Few times someone else entered the room, and each time I completly freaked out, not recognizing who it was – even if only people I knew since years entered!
Somehow my friends calmed me down until I fell asleep again, and fell asleep aswell, not expecting my condition would become worse.
When they woke up few hours later and saw that I had puked while sleeping, the tried to wake me up – but I didn’t wake up anymore.
I had passed out again.
They rendered first help, carried me to their car and brought me to the hospital.
There, after the they had told the doctors what had happened, the police came and took a blood sample from me because the had the strong suspicion that I was drugged by someone.
My friends and some people from the partyplace kept staying at the hospital, waiting for news, waiting for me to wake up, and calling my parents.
I woke up at the 14th of October, almost 24 hours later.
I have no memory at all of the 13th of October, even I was carried to another hospital, they had been done a checkup, taken a blood sample from me, talked to me; but I wouldn’t have react at all to them.
So, at the morning of the 14th I woke up with horrible headache, as if my head would explode, barely could open my eyes, and as I finally did, I thought I were still asleep, just dreaming that I woke up in this room – I had no idea where I was for the first few minutes.
Then I saw that I was wearing hospital clothes, and realized there were venipuncture marks on my wrists, also I had an infusion on my right arm…
A nurse entered.
She told me, that I had been on that party two days ago, and that my friends had brought me to hospital, because I collapsed in the morning and they think that someone had put something into my drink.
When she told me that, I actually was not able to think anything at all; still feeling very sick and confused, and my mind just felt like not working anymore.
They drove my bed to another room for a MRT and an EEG, and I just let them do whatever, feeling still to weak to ask anything or to even be upset about what had happened.
When I came back to my room, my parents were waiting there.
They told me everything my friends had told them, and that’s everything I wrote down here.
Few hours later, after the doctors had checked everything, they came with the result: My brain was okay, my heart was okay, my body completly was fine, and as all drug tests have been negative (and anyway; I never take drugs) they came to the conclusion, that someone must have been putting a huge amount of knockout drops into my drink.
(Yes, though the drugtests are negative; usually knockout drops are just provable within very few hours in the blood.)
Now, ten days later, I’m sitting at home, my doctor gave me a sick note for two weeks, and I’m almost fine again, doing sports again, learning for university at home, but still trying to figure out, who did this to me.
For that, Police called me yesterday to come over today, to talk about that night, so they could investigate in my case and I also expected to get the results from the blood test they had made, which was more exact than the one from the hospital.
But what they told me today: They didn’t even check my blood, neither my waterbottle in which the drug might have been.
They just wanted me to reconstruct that night to complete the case, finally asking me “If it wasn’t possible that I had taken some mushrooms or something in the noon before the party?”.
Maybe I have been naive, expecting police’d seriously research on that case or take me serious and not just pegging me as a “Hippie who’s anyway taking drugs”.
I was lucky that night to be surrounded by people I know, to be with friends and to be in a place, where people are looking for each other.
I was lucky that night, that I didn’t drink more and that I was anyway living healthy, otherwise that amount of whatever in my drink might have had killed me.
I was lucky.
But others all around the world were not.
I still can’t really think clear, but I’ll get well again.
But others won’t.
And they won’t get justice.
They won’t get justice, as long police is accusing the one who was drugged to have been taking drugs, as long as no one believes, that these things happen: People, and yes, mostly women, are drugged to get raped.
Finally, I wish I could do anything else but just be fine with the fact that I’ll probably never know who drugged me, and that makes me so angry, to know that someone out there almost killed me, that someone out there was ready to do something so horrible to me, and that just luck saved me.
To do at least anything, I decided to share my story on this blog, which anyway was made to share this kind of stories, and I wish, I could tell you anything else I learned from that case but: “Never leave your drink out of your eyes, don’t take drinks from strangers, and open your bottles yourself, refill your bottle yourself.”
Well, and never stop being loyal to yourself.
Don’t let others treat you like this.
Don’t let others do violence to you in any way – and if they did – don’t keep silent!